Link meets Cooking Mama
by Jane O'Callaghan
Summary: This is a Legend of Zelda/Cooking Mama crossover, where Link is forced to cook something, or die! Well, maybe it's not that dramatic, but you get the idea...


Hello! This is just a 'for fun' kind of thing... I know that Cooking Mama isn't in the Zelda games! Or is she? (looks around suspicously...) Anyway, this idea was actually my mom's, she just recently got the Cooking Mama game and she thought it would be funny if Link tried to cook something too, and seeing as how she doesn't have a profile thingy on this website, I said I would write it for her! Also, I totally pwn her when it comes to writing skillz! Muhahahaha! Um... actually, she's better at writing things... but anyway, here's the story! Oh, and this can take place pretty much during any of the Zelda games, so just pick which Link you like the best! I guess the Wind Waker one won't work, because there's not really any Hyrule Town...but the others should fit!

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Link meets Cooking Mama

Hyrule Castle Town was, once again, bustling with random people and merchants. The tall guards that all looked the same were standing in places that they called 'strategic areas', but they were really just trying to keep from being run over, as everyone very much doubted that hiding behind a large pile of barrels was considered strategic. A young boy could also be seen in this town, trying to push his way to one of the many buildings. This boy was a common sight in the town, and the people were used to seeing him. He was dressed differently from everyone else, he wore a green tunic and a matching color hat, and various weapons were strapped to his belt. The people had at first teased him for his clothes, but after the teasing people started to mysteriously disappear, the remaining towns folk decided to leave the kid alone.

This boy was called Link, and he was currently investigating the newest house that had just opened up. Apparently, it was some sort of restaurant, and Link felt it was his duty to check it out, incase it had bugs in it or something. Plus, he was hoping to get a free meal. He liked free things. "Free things, free things, free food is good!" Link was mumbling to himself as he forced his way between a large group of people who were yelling at one of the merchants. The merchant was desperately looking for something to distract the mob from the cheap item he had been trying to sell for a couple hundred rupees, and his eyes fell upon Link, who was nearly at the small restaurant. "Ah! There's Link! Go get him!" the merchant shouted. The mob turned as one to the young boy, who had frozen when the merchant's words had hit him. He slowly turned around to see the large group of angry people charging towards him.

"I want my dog back!" a woman shouted angrily.

"And I want my flowers back!" another woman shouted.

"And I want my hat back! You aren't even wearing it!" yet another woman shouted.

A few more demands were shouted out, but Link was already running the rest of the way to his destination, leaving the mob far behind. He quickly ran inside the restaurant and slammed the small door behind him. He gave a sigh of relief as he started to walk around the dimly lit building, nearly tripping on a table as he went. After yelling at the table for awhile, a small woman came bouncing in, her large eyes staring at Link cheerfully. "Hi there! I'm Mama!" the woman said. Link was about to request a free meal, when Mama interrupted the boy's thoughts. "I need help in the kitchen! You will help prepare the food for the friends!" Mama said as she pulled the boy into another room. This one had better lighting, and most of it was filled with counters and stoves. "Ok, make this!" Mama said as she handed a very confused Link a recipe for pizza. Link was about to say that he had no idea how to cook, but before he could, Mama went bouncing back out to look for more victims…uh…helpers.

Link gave a resigned sigh before getting to work. He was just cracking an egg into a bowl when Mama came back in, startling the boy, which caused him to drop the egg. Suddenly flames appeared in Mama's eyes, making the boy feel very frightened of the short woman. "Don't worry, Mama will fix this!" Mama said, still angry. After Mama had dropped a few eggs into the bowl, she handed it back to Link for him to stir. "I'll time you, you stir!" Mama said happily.

"Ok…" Link said uncertainly as he grabbed the whisk. He slowly started to stir, and he was just getting into a good rhythm when suddenly Mama stopped him.

"Time is up!" Mama said cheerfully.

"But that was only ten seconds!" Link protested as Mama peered into the bowl. The flames came back into her eyes when she saw that the ingredients hadn't been mixed properly. "Don't worry, Mama will fix this!" she shouted at him, glaring at the boy. Link sighed as Mama grabbed the whisk from him and started to stir at an extremely fast pace. In just a few seconds she had finished, and she pulled the dough out and handed it to Link. "Now you have to kneed it!" she said.

"Fine!" Link snapped before throwing the dough onto a counter top. He started to carefully stretch it, and after a few seconds Mama threw a rolling pin at him.

"Roll it out!" she said cheerfully. Link did as he was told, but after a few minutes Mama stopped him. Apparently, he had rolled it out too far, and the dough was now too big. Mama started to slowly clap for him, "Ok, you gave it your best effort!"

After a few seconds, Mama had made a new dough, and she had then rolled it out to the correct size. "Now you have to toss it!" Mama said, handing the dough back to Link. Link gave another sigh before throwing it into the air, and then quickly covering his head with his hands as the dough came back down. Link quickly ran out of the way, and the dough landed on the floor with a flop. Link gave a short scream when he saw Mama looking angrier than ever. "Don't worry, Mama will fix this!" Mama said in an annoyed tone. Mama then had to make yet another dough, and she was soon expertly tossing it around. Finally she handed it back to Link so he could spread the tomato sauce on it. "Now this I can do!" Link said happily as he started to pour the jar of sauce onto the dough. After awhile Mama came to check on him, and she smiled when she saw the almost finished pizza. "Perfect! Even better than Mama!" she said, clapping happily.

"Really?" Link asked excitedly.

"No, but I felt like I should say something nice, since you messed up everything else."

"Oh," Link said, before sighing sadly. "What's next?" he asked miserably.

"Now, we cook it! Set it to bake at two hundred fifty, for thirty minutes!"

"Ok!" Link said, and he began to randomly push the buttons on the stove.

Suddenly flames appeared in Mama's eyes, again. "Don't worry, Mama will fix this!" she shouted, and she ran to the other side of the kitchen to make another dough. Link frowned at her and then looked to see what he had done wrong this time. "Oops," he mumbled, when he saw that he had set it to bake at two hundred fifty-one for twenty-nine minutes.

Wondering how it could make such a difference, he watched as Mama came running up to him with the new pizza. She shoved the boy out of the way and threw in the pizza before setting the oven correctly. After the thirty minutes were finished, Mama pulled out the pizza and threw it at Link, who was enjoying some crepes that Mama had made the other day. "Isn't it finished yet?!" Link shouted as he examined the pizza.

"It needs to be decorated!" Mama explained as she started to throw some toppings at Link before running back outside to wait for customers.

"Yum! Olives!" Link said happily, as he began to eat them all.

After a few minutes, Mama came back to see if Link had finished with the pizza. The flames came back in her eyes when she saw that Link had eaten every single topping. "Um… you can fix it?" Link asked, pointing at the pizza.

"No! I am out of ingredients now!" Suddenly the flames disappeared and she started to clap. "Ok, you gave it your best effort!" she said.

"What?" Link asked, confused over the sudden change.

"Now you can make something else!"

"Oh no!" Link shouted, desperately looking for a way out of the kitchen.

"You can now make cookies!"

"Darn!" Link shouted, and he was soon put in front of another bowl, and more eggs were handed to him.

Meanwhile, another innocent person was coming to eat at Mama's restaurant. As soon as she entered, Mama came running to greet her. Just as the new person was being seated, Link came running out. "Run, customer! Run for your life!" Link shouted. But it was too late. Mama grabbed the customer and threw her into the kitchen along with Link. "Now, what can you cook for friends?" Mama asked the customer, who was looking around nervously.

"Actually, I don't cook," the woman said cheerfully.

"You fool!" Link shouted. "Why did you come here!?"

"Um…I was hungry?"

Link just gave her a disgusted sigh.

"Now, why don't you make the dumplings?" Mama asked suddenly as she handed the new kitchen helper a small barbecue type thing.

"Um, I said I'm not that good at cooking…" the woman said, while Link started to chop up some ingredients, glancing in fear at Mama every few seconds. Mama just smiled at the customer, until one of the dumplings started to burn. Flames appeared in her eyes, "Don't worry, Mama will fix this! What else can you make?"

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Well, there it is! Hope you liked it! I apologize if some of the steps for making the pizza didn't belong there, but I never really made the pizza so I sort of just guessed at what the steps were... I could've tried to play the game to get the correct steps, but my mother really likes her ds, and really dislikes sharing her ds... so there you go!


End file.
